Unlearning

“Oh our Lord, do not take us to task if we forget or make mistakes.” (Surah Al-Baqarah: 2:286)

There’s no shame in having flaws. Flaws in our character, actions, the ways we may view the world and perceive things, but the flaw is the inability to acknowledge and change these shortcomings when brought to our attention. The real flaw is the inability to take criticism because of the ego. The real flaw is the refusal of personal introspection. The real flaw is the inability to admit, take responsibility and work to improve on your mistakes.

Sometimes you find yourself so deep in an unhealthy pattern or way of thinking that you can’t even notice it for a very long period of time. And only when a sudden indicator of how wrong you have been is brought to light, do you realise. And it slaps you right in the face. This is a blessing from God disguised as a much needed slap in the face. The reality is that as imperfect humans, each of us have internal issues and each time we are able to realise them we have been gifted. Whether it may have been through a sly comment, sincere thoughts from a friend, a broken relationship, a failed exam or your own reflection.

But the complication is, undoing deeply in built patterns of thinking or habits isn’t easy, especially when it has been subconscious for so long. But the power comes from the knowledge of your flaw and then the conscious effort to battle your natural inclinations. Each time your mind screams that thought you now know is unhealthy, you must yell back. “I have no right to judge them”, “my body is beautiful”, “it’s not always about you”, “just because this was your experience it’s not theirs too”. Counteract your thoughts and make conscious efforts to work through your unhealthy ways of thinking to come out as a better, healthier version of yourself for the sake of Allah.